Introversion and extroversion occur on a spectrum. This means that there are different degrees of introversion. No one person is completely an introvert or completely an extrovert. Though every introvert is different, most introverts share certain traits and challenges.
Some introverted traits seem to be ingrained. Others are a result of the culture we live in. For example, many introverts have learned to cope with constant overstimulation by putting up a wall. This leads people to believe that introverts are cold, or standoffish, but this is not our true nature. The innate qualities that most introverts share are a love of introspection, a need for solitude, and a slower, more focused communication style.
When someone hears the term introvert, their initial thought is usually “shy” or “quiet." While introverts are quieter and some may even consider themselves shy, this is not something that is universal for all introverts. Introverts typically draw their energy from within and frequently need quiet time to refuel (which may explain why they are perceived as “shy”). Introverts tend to channel more of their attention to their rich inner lives and like to spend more time alone. This can sometimes be worrying to extroverted parents or partners who don't understand how someone can spend so much time alone. Families often worry about their teens or partners isolating themselves. This leads to questions of depression or severe lack of motivation.
Counseling can be difficult for introverts, especially if your previous experience has been with a more extroverted therapist. My work is with the individual as well as the parent/family. It's important for extroverted loved ones to understand that what looks like isolation to them, is actually energy building for an introvert. The energy it takes for an introvert to share personal information about themselves is often draining. As an introvert, I understand the process of having to think about every situation before coming up with a response or an idea. I try to help make that process as natural as possible. Therapy with me is not forced or fast paced. We'll take as much time as you need in order for you to feel comfortable with sharing your feelings.
